One-Liners

The latest and greatest quotes from Ashlyn Belle:

"Kisses make me dizzy"

"Yes your majesty" - said to me after I had repeatedly called for her and had finally resorted to yelling.

"You're choking my belly" - said while holding her up to the sink to wash her hands.

Ashlyn, said very enthusiastically: "Mom! I saw a real frog in my room!"
Me: "Oh my heck! You did?"
Ashlyn, said very casually: "Well...maybe I didn't."

"My decisions are always conditional"

Said at Christmastime -
Ashlyn: "Sometimes when everything seems hopeless, do you know what is right?"
Me: "What?"
Ashlyn: "I get to meet Santa's reindeer"

"I really, really, really love...Grandma" - said to Grandpa.

Ashlyn: "Do you know why I like to lie so much?"
Me: Huh. "Why's that?"
Ashlyn: "Because it is so fun!"

And then about a month later: "Uncle Marty and Jesus don't like lying"

Me: "What were you thinking?!" - said after she had just made a colossal mess.
Ashlyn: "Something really awesome!"

The Little Things

I don't know what I would do without my kiddos. They make me smile every day. With all the stress going on right now, they are especially key to my sanity.

While driving home from our "project" the other day, Ashlyn told me, "Mommy I love you this much (arms stretched out wide), and all my heart." Ditto.

I watched in amusement yesterday as Trent taunted Cooper for about ten minutes with a doggie treat. Cooper followed him around like...well, a puppy, as Trent in frustration repeatedly told Cooper, "You. need. to. say. PLEEEEASE!"

*Photo courtesy of Clique Photography, taken July '09

Slowly But Surely

We are making progress on our home remodel, although at times it feels as though we take one step forward and then two steps back. Okay, not really. Every project does get us closer to moving in, but there is still so much to be done and I thought for sure we would be living there by now. Oh well. What do we do? We have no choice but to keep forging ahead and ever so slowly continue to cross things off the "to-do" list.

The painting is pretty much complete. Just a little touch up here and there. It is amazing what a fresh coat of paint can do to a room and home. We said goodbye to the sky blue ceiling in the master bedroom, the ketchup and mustard in the family room, the out-of-place green wall in living room, and the dull, dirty white in every other nook and cranny. The ceilings, doors, trim, and closets are now all a bright white, Ashlyn's room is her promised "ice folly", the play room is a friendly "frosted lemon", and the rest of the house is a nice neutral "water chestnut", with the exception of an added "belgian sweet" in the master. I love the smell of fresh paint.

The kitchen and entry have been re-tiled and I am quite pleased with the results. Not so shabby for a couple of amateurs. The re-staining of the wood work is underway. And 90% of the new lights have been installed - just three more to go.

This project has taken its toll on us. Brian and I are both on edge a little (or a lot, depending on the moment). We are stressed and tired, so very tired. The record late-night so far is 3:00 am. The kids seem a bit confused and out of their element, being tossed from home to home, staying up way to late (no, they didn't stay up until 3:00 am), and not getting enough daddy time. We have to keep telling ourselves that it will all be worth it. I can't wait for the day that we will be cuddled up together on the couch on a Friday night with a movie and big bowl of popcorn. *SIGH*. Some day.

What If?

Every once in awhile I ask myself a "what if" question. I am sure most people do this, or do they? And it's not that I am wishing my life were different in any way, it just out of curiosity. What if my parents didn't move from West Valley to South Jordan? What if I had won, instead of sorely lost, in the student body election? What if I had moved away for my college years? What if I hadn't taken that one job? What if Brian and I hadn't waited for 5 years to have kids? You get the point. My life today is a result of many forks in the road. The path that I chose to follow or was lead to, has gotten me to this point. And my life is good. Sure I have ups and downs, good days and bad days, times of pure stress (like right now) and times of pure joy. But overall, I really can't complain. And then again, I can't help but wonder from time to time how my life would be different if I had taken a different path.

I have a reoccurring dream. It happens randomly. I have been unable to make a connection as to why I have it, when I have it. It probably happens 4-8 times per year. The people who are in it and the circumstances are always different, but the message I get from it is always the same: Life is NOT greener on the other side! In every dream, my life is different from my actual reality. I am never married to Brian, although sometimes he is lurking in the background. Sometimes I am married to some random person from my past, like an old peer or co-worker, and sometimes I am married to a complete stranger. And then sometimes I am not married at all. Sometimes I am living in Utah and sometimes I am living elsewhere, like New York. And here is the kicker, I am never happy. Ever. In my dream, I always feel as though something is missing. There is a void. I am not satisfied with life or with my marriage, and I long for things to be different. I should also mention that in my dream I know that my life is suppose to be different. That I had messed up and had not gone down the right path.

I had my dream again last night. I was married to a guy I went to high school with. Nice kid. We were in the process of moving out of the state. Something was not right. I wanted my "real life" back. So, this morning I woke up and was once again reminded that my life is good and just exactly the way it should be.